Interviewed by Talia

The game:

1. Leave me a comment saying, "Interview me."
2. I will respond by asking you five questions. I get to pick the questions.
3. You will update your blog (if you have one) with the answers to the questions OR you answer them here in the comments if you don't have a blog.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

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1. What do you fear the most?

I can’t say I’ve ever thought about this deeply. It took me a long time to determine the difference between fear and dread, fear and sorrow, fear and horror. My first thoughts went to my children. Losing a child—what a horror, and what incredible sorrow that would bring. But I keep in mind that there is only so much a mom can do for a child, and though I feel some trepidation for the unknown and for things that are beyond my control, I don’t think I fear it.

I’m not afraid of dying. I’m not afraid of trampolines. I’m not claustrophobic. I’m not afraid of snakes, though spiders give me the willies. Sometimes I have irrational fears, like of scorpions being in my slippers. Someone knocking on my door late at night frightens me for a few moments. And the current administration is scary, definitely. So are people with big, googly, non-blinking zombie eyes.

But I guess the one fear that has resurfaced over and over since the time I was a little girl, is fire. Not bonfires, but a house fire, while I’m sleeping. Either that or being stalked.

I’m also a little bit afraid of loud noises and people who sneak up on me. And, I’m afraid of turning into my mother.

Okay, but on a daily basis, I fear stupidity and being a party to it.

2. You may trade places with anyone alive or dead (not fictional) for 24 hours -- no more and no less. You only get one chance. Who would it be?

These are hard questions, Talia. Assuming trading places means I get to actually ‘be’ the person and own his thoughts from birth up until that day, I’m torn between choosing a funny person/comedian and somebody in history whose life did something to expose or change the world…without the realization or specific intention that he/she would do that. I’d want to experience oppression that I as a white woman in the 21st century will probably never know. I guess I’d go with Rosa Parks.

Though if I chose a man I’d have a penis and just see what it’s like to carry that silly thing around all day…

3. Write an autobiography in 25 words or less.

Wheezus doesn’t always get it right but she sure as hell tries.

4. What question would you like me to ask you? Why?

I’d like you to ask me if you could be my bitch. Because it would make me feel totally tough.

5. Lick something. What did it feel like.

Okay, I did this. It felt warm, a little dusty, and I got an electric shock from it. Which proves that Jon Stewart felt it for me, too.


Don't forget that if you want to be interviewed, leave a request in the comment section.